What’s the difference between a narcissist and a covert narcissist? While both share some common traits, they exhibit different behaviors and coping mechanisms that set them apart. Understanding these differences is crucial for anyone dealing with a narcissistic personality disorder, as it can help in recognizing the unique challenges that covert narcissists present in relationships and social interactions.
Narcissism is characterized by an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. However, narcissists can be categorized into two main types: overt and covert. Overt narcissists, also known as grandiose narcissists, are usually very confident and show their grandiosity openly. In contrast, covert narcissists, also referred to as vulnerable or shy narcissists, tend to be more reserved and secretive about their self-centeredness.
One of the primary differences between overt and covert narcissists is their level of self-esteem. Overt narcissists often have high self-esteem, which allows them to display their grandiosity without much reservation. They may boast about their achievements, seek constant admiration, and be overly critical of others. On the other hand, covert narcissists typically have low self-esteem and are often overly sensitive to criticism. They may internalize negative feedback and feel inferior, which leads them to compensate for their insecurities by belittling others or manipulating situations to their advantage.
Another significant difference lies in their interpersonal relationships. Overt narcissists are usually very assertive and may dominate conversations, push their own agenda, and belittle others to assert their superiority. They may also be prone to explosive anger when their needs are not met. In contrast, covert narcissists are often more passive-aggressive. They may use subtle tactics, such as ignoring or belittling others, to manipulate situations and gain control. They may also be more prone to feelings of envy and resentment, which can manifest as covert aggression or sabotage.
Covert narcissists may also struggle with shame and guilt more than overt narcissists. They may feel guilty for their self-centeredness and may try to compensate by being overly accommodating or self-sacrificing. This can lead to codependent relationships, where the covert narcissist constantly seeks validation and approval from others. Overt narcissists, on the other hand, may not experience the same level of guilt or shame, which can make them more difficult to detect and confront.
Understanding the differences between narcissists and covert narcissists is essential for those who are in relationships with them. By recognizing the unique challenges that covert narcissists present, individuals can develop strategies to cope with their behavior and seek support when needed. Therapy can also be beneficial for both the narcissist and their loved ones, as it can help address underlying issues and improve communication.
In conclusion, while both narcissists and covert narcissists share some common traits, their behaviors and coping mechanisms differ significantly. Recognizing these differences can help individuals navigate the complexities of relationships with narcissistic personalities and seek the support they need to thrive.